It might be controversial, but someone has got to say it.
Not everyone needs to have a post-wedding brunch.
I know you might be wondering why I’m dead set on breaking this age-old tradition, but hear me out. If we are all being honest, after a night of dancing, and celebrating, the thought of having a full-blown brunch the next day can be quite overwhelming for the entire wedding party, not to mention expensive for the newlyweds.
We've all been to weddings where the next-day brunch feels like an obligatory follow-up event. But what if we skipped it and rethought that time and budget allocation?
Sometimes, Brunch Makes Sense
There are indeed situations where brunch makes sense, for example:
Destination Weddings
When a wedding is in a beautiful, far-off location, brunch can be a great way for guests to reconnect and unwind after the festivities of the previous day. It provides an opportunity for attendees to bond over shared experiences in a new and exciting setting. The relaxed atmosphere of brunch can also extend the honeymoon vibes for the newlyweds and their guests.
It’s Included or Convenient
Sometimes, hosting a brunch is the easiest option, especially if it is included in the venue's package or part of a hotel's weekend deal. In such cases, it might be simpler to opt for brunch and let guests enjoy a hassle-free meal without any additional planning or expenses.
Extended Connections
For some wedding guests, the brunch offers a chance to connect with family and friends they may not have seen during the wedding itself. It can be a more intimate gathering, allowing for meaningful conversations and further celebrations.
In these cases, brunch can be a lovely way to gather and nourish everyone before they go their separate ways. But what about the other times?
When Post-Wedding Brunch Becomes a Burden
After the excitement of the wedding day has died down, and the happy couple has exchanged their vows and embarked on their new journey together, the prospect of a post-wedding brunch can sometimes seem like a daunting addition to the festivities. While it's a wonderful opportunity for friends and family to gather and celebrate one last time, there are a few reasons why some couples might find it overwhelming.
Funds are Limited
Planning a wedding is an expensive endeavor, and by the time the big day arrives, many couples find themselves stretched thin financially. The cost of a venue, catering, attire, and all the other necessary details can add up quickly. Adding a post-wedding brunch to the itinerary might mean stretching an already tight budget even further. Some couples may feel pressured to provide a full spread for their guests, which can be a significant expense, especially if there are uninvited guests who show up.
Too Many Tag-Alongs
There might be guests who have children or elderly family members in tow, which can change the dynamics of the brunch from a relaxed gathering to a full-blown family event. The couple might feel responsible for catering to all ages and interests, which can be a burden.
More importantly, it can be a burden for guests caring for children or other family members to have to rouse and dress a large group the morning after a very big day.
You Are Simply Tuckered Out
Wedding days are emotionally and physically taxing, even for the most energetic couples. By the morning after the wedding, the newlyweds might just want to sleep in, relax, and recover from the whirlwind of the previous day. The idea of hosting a brunch, greeting more guests, and being "on" again so soon can be overwhelming. Couples may feel pressured to put on a happy face and entertain, but in reality, they just crave some quiet time to themselves.
If Not Brunch, Then What?
Now that you have reclaimed your time and some cash, what should you do instead?
Here are a few ideas:
Start the Honeymoon Right Away
For couples who just want to escape and begin their new life together, why not let the guests bid them farewell at the wedding venue and then give them the gift of silence and relaxation?
Warm Welcome Drinks or an Amazing After-Party
Nothing is more fun than seeing friends from out of town. Instead of waiting until after the wedding to reconnect, invite your out-of-town guests for a welcome drink when they arrive in town before your ceremony.
More of a night owl than an early bird? For those who still want to keep the party going, a late-night after-party or a fun evening event could be a great alternative to brunch.
Low-Key Lunch
Imagine having sandwich trays or a casual picnic by the water, where guests can drop by, say their goodbyes, and wish the happy couple well without the formality of a sit-down brunch.
One couple who were recently married at Oceableu in the Hamptons is taking advantage of the beautiful scenery at the beach as an opportunity to connect with their guests. By hosting their lunch in a big open space and catering some grab-and-go selections, they are offering a low-pressure way to round off their special weekend.
Shifting Perspectives
Considering these factors, skipping the post-wedding brunch might not just be a personal decision for the newlyweds; it's also indicative of a larger trend in the wedding industry. Couples are increasingly opting for more intimate and meaningful wedding experiences over extravagant and over-the-top celebrations. They want to focus on creating lasting memories with their closest friends and family, without the added stress and burden of catering to a large crowd.
This shift towards smaller, more personalized weddings reflects a desire for authenticity and connection in the modern world. It's about cherishing the moments that truly matter and surrounding oneself with the people who have been instrumental in the journey of life.
So, while post-wedding brunches will continue to be a lovely tradition for some, the rise in intimate wedding celebrations suggests that more and more couples are choosing to prioritize their happiness and well-being on their special day over perfunctory traditions.
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